Different Planet Promotion

5 days in the life of an English office are described in this book, available for $0.99 up until 9th April. There’s lots of banter and insults flying around. The main character Albert Merton has worked at the same firm for a number of years. Albert’s always been boorish, anti-recycling and anti-exercise but after losingContinue reading “Different Planet Promotion”

Different Planet – 1

An extract from Different Planet – a story about 5 days in an English office available here on Amazon. Albert Merton reversed his Hummer out of the driveway. Immediately there was a screech of brakes and the honking of a horn. Merton looked behind him and saw the bus driver gesticulating wildly.   Merton gotContinue reading “Different Planet – 1”

10 jokes from the Edinburgh Festival

Robert Garnham: Insomnia is awful. But on the plus side – only three more sleeps till Christmas. Dan Antopolski: Centaurs shop at Topman. And Bottomhorse. Paul Savage: Oregon leads America in both marital infidelity and clinical depression. What a sad state of affairs. Caroline Mabey: I’m very conflicted by eye tests. I want to get the answers right butContinue reading “10 jokes from the Edinburgh Festival”

Coconut Shy – Part 2

The other throwing events follow the pattern of the rest of the games and involve athletes hurling discuses, javelins, and hammers at a coconut. In the discus the coconut is set on a plinth at a distance of 55 metres from the throwing circle. If the discus lands within two metres of the coconut theContinue reading “Coconut Shy – Part 2”

Sports the Olympics Forgot – Coconut Shy – Part 1

The coconut shy is a staple attraction in British country fairs, but in India the game was taken far more seriously and evolved into a major sport especially around Cochin. The Cochin Coconut Shy takes place over the Easter weekend and involves many different events, which have gradually been added since the competition first tookContinue reading “Sports the Olympics Forgot – Coconut Shy – Part 1”

Head in the Clouds – Chapter 3

Sheila opened the front door and shouted “Hello everyone I’m home.” The silence was almost audible. All she could hear was the cat miaowing. Sheila took off her shoes and went into the kitchen. Her husband, Walter, was sitting at the table pressing his Blackberry with a pointer. He was frowning with concentration. “Hello Walter,Continue reading “Head in the Clouds – Chapter 3”

Head in the Clouds – Chapter 2

Sheila waited at the bus stop. After 10 minutes the bus arrived. There were a few seats available. Sheila sat next to a young man wearing headphones. The bus started off. Immediately, he stood up and stared at her. “Do you want to get off?” asked Sheila. The youth stared at her. Sheila gesticulated atContinue reading “Head in the Clouds – Chapter 2”

Goat Parva Murders – Chapter 5

Carol Herald was in position early for her morning thrills; this morning it was going to be Lord Avon and his stable lad cavorting in the ferns in Hen’s Wood. Lord Avon would sit astride the youth and then whip him quite savagely as he bucked and pranced in imitation of a bull – itContinue reading “Goat Parva Murders – Chapter 5”

Head in the Clouds – Chapter 1

Sheila Walker sat at her desk in an office cubicle surrounded on three sides by her colleagues. On the fourth side was a common corridor which was mainly used by people when they were hurrying off to begin private phone conversations. Sheila had worked for the same firm since leaving secondary school in 1996. “At leastContinue reading “Head in the Clouds – Chapter 1”

Goat Parva Murders – Chapter 4

Knowles parked his Land Rover in the car park of the Badger & Ferret Inn and looked at his watch. “Right, Sergeant Barnes, I think you should go and see Carol Herald and find out what she knows and work out what she’s not telling you, if you know what I mean. Above all seeContinue reading “Goat Parva Murders – Chapter 4”